give me a break

OK, so we've heard and seen the ads for how restaurants are offering your hamburgers and sandwiches in the form of a wrap. This is to help us feel that the restaurant is looking out for our best interest. Its like they are trying to help us feel better about the healthy choices we are beating ourselves into while at the same time trying to cater to our 'indulgent' side. I mean really - do you want your Big Mac in a wrap? Do you want that Italian meatball sub in a wrap instead? Here I am as a discerning consumer trying to switch my love of the bread slice for the healthier wrap. It's thinner, has less volume and it even tastes bland - all the pre-requisites for a healthier tomorrow.

Until now.

My darling wife - who happens to have graduated from University with a science major - sheepishly (yet with that cute smile she gets when she knows she is right)tells me that the wrap I am about to consume is boldly ling to me and that any thoughts of 'healthier' choices should be cross-referenced with the nutritional notes on the package. In a half-mocking, half 'I can't believe it' tone I refer to those sections where the math does not lie.

To my horror I discover that one measly, skinny, ridiculously thin and flimsy freak of the leaven has more calories, more fat, more sodium and more carbohydrate than two - yes that's right two - pieces of my beloved yet "bad for me like oil to a duck" slices of bread. Well, snap. I lose it. What a joke. What a waste of my time and effort. By the time I have forced myself to consume two of those discs of displeasure I could have enjoyed five slices from the bread bag of fun. Never again. People, stop buying into the lie and return to the freshly baked loaf of goodness. Besides, has anyone ever seen anybody dip a plain wrap into their gravy? I didn't think so.